If you just resend the same lame initial greeting to me, I will ignore you a second time


Image courtesy of Google Images

Laziness seems to be prevalent in all aspects of society. People are lazy when it comes to their jobs, their homes, raising their kids (just my opinion, take it or leave it), and apparently in online dating. This is what I have deduced from my experience with the dating website. There have been several men who’ve sent me one of the banal “hi” or “hello” messages, to which I choose not to respond. (I know I briefly discussed this topic in a prior blog post, but I decided to go into more detail this time because it’s still happening.) The reason I don’t respond is that I am not intrigued by such messages. At all. Nothing sparks my interest less than by sending me a “hi” message. And to me, messages like that smack of laziness. Just sending “hi” says to me that the sender is too lazy to introduce himself or that he was too lazy to read my profile and start some sort of actual conversation. Most likely he is just reacting to my photos (hopefully not in a creepy way). What is even lazier is when, after no response from me, the same guy sends “hi” again. This has happened with a few guys so far. Sigh. All I can think of when I get another “hi” message from a guy who’s already said “hi” is the scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail when Arthur and his men encounter the French soldiers. In the words of the main French soldier, “…now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.” In my specific situation, I am Arthur and the men sending repeated “hi” messages are the French soldier, taunting me with their lazy messages.

Now, perhaps I’m misinterpreting these repetitive messages. Maybe those men are extremely shy and don’t know what to say to me. Maybe they’re like the young man who approached me in a bar recently, introduced himself, and then proceeded to stare at me while swallowing obviously and awkwardly several times. I kept expecting him to ask a question or start the conversation, but he just stood there and stared. I got more conversation out of the guy I cut in front of to get to the restroom at the back of the bar. I don’t really know why those men just repeat the same message to me, hoping for an answer. I am curious about whether this tactic works on other women on the dating website. Perhaps I require more conversational stimulation to pique my interest in a guy, but I find it hard to believe that other females on the dating website don’t also want a little more conversation from interested men. Don’t get me wrong, I realize there are some women on the dating website who are just looking for sex. But there are bound to be other women like me on there who are looking for an actual relationship to start with someone, something based on mutual interests and attraction and not just sex. Am I wrong? Am I naive?

Anyways, that’s about all I have to say about that. I suppose it could be worse. I could be receiving no messages from any men on the dating website. Or I could receive messages even less interesting/stimulating than “hi.” Oh wait, I did receive a message like that. It was from a guy who didn’t have a profile photo and who just sent “:)” as a message. That’s right, an emoticon. Not only does this guy not have a photo of himself with which I can form an initial impression, but he also apparently has no ability to communicate using written words. Maybe I should send “:(” as a response because that’s so sad.


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